Part two: Why SHE won't cuff you ...
The bottom line is that we don't got time for your games, the disappointment, the heartbreak, the up and down of emotions, nor the mental capacity to juggle you and our goals collectively. The idea of being black is hard, now add being a woman to the equation. It gets even more difficult. I feel like naturally, we are at the bottom of the barrel so if we want to succeed we have to fight harder than anyone else does, and it says a lot about you if you're fighting for what you want, going that extra mile every day, even through mental and spiritual breakdowns to ultimately live that extraordinary life.
The life I live maybe basic but the life I'm fighting for is far from it. I'm shedding my old skin to welcome the new one, and in between, I'm fighting my old habits getting prepared for what I asked for.
Most women, most black women, have gone through a lot more than most can imagine. Anywhere from mental abuse, physical or sexual, discrimination, belittlement, and abandonment, the list really goes on and on. But the point is; is that when we go to love on a man, preferably a black man, we want that initial intention, LOVE.What some, (not all of us) get in return is a broken heart and an additional void. We get all involved for men to play us like we're one of they damn video games. We extend enormous amounts of love and support where in some instances or areas we lack for ourselves.
2016 was the storm, 2017 was dealing with the aftermath and 2018 is the breakthrough, the rebirth of a solidified, conscious, strong-minded woman and frankly, we don't have the time, nor energy to waste on a scrub.
Most women I come across that are in the process of setting the foundation for their success and they think the same way too. We've endured the storm and then some, we want mental and spiritual peace, we want to accomplish our goals, we want what the fuck we deserve POINT BLANK.
Let me tell you why we won't cuff you.
1.) We TIRED
We're tired of the same old same old. WE WANT LONGEVITY. We want love outside of the ordinary, we want what the fuck we give you. Apply the 50/50 rule, go hard for me like I do for you. Pick me up in areas that I'm lacking, don't just fuck me and expect me to fix the both of us.
2.) You're too emotionally and mentally broken
We may be already dealing with our own voids, struggles etc, and the notion of dealing with my problems AND yours is too much to bare. Additionally knowing that the end result is getting mistreated, belittled, disrespected, lied to or hurt. We aren't even breaking even. At least with us, if you are dealing with a broken woman she is STILL offering something worth your while, even through her brokenness. Because that's just how strong we really are.
3.) You're a hoe
Men are always so quick to call us hoes but are always the ones who brag about body counts lol. Anywho, you a hoe and we don't want to deal with a man who can't commit. I don't want to worry about other women getting the opportunity to lay up with you or fuck you. Sadly, most millennials have sex WITHOUT CONDOMS and if you are then you also have to worry about catching something. Ideally, we want you to ourselves but you out there slanging and it just ain't cool.
4.) You're not self-sufficient
I know personally I can't date a bum, although there are some women who look past that, but I can't. Obviously, it depends on the circumstances but look, you have to be driven, motivated and implementing that every day, I need to be seeing some sort of effort. No career, no car, no education, no goals, no hustle = WE GOT NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT. I need my man to be bringing something to the table and if he can't financially, he better be in other areas.
5.) You're overly into me, or OBSESSED.
Ok, more than likely I'm instantly turned off. I don't want or need no psychotic love. I need to know that you don't need me you WANT ME.It's sexier that way...
6.) You're controlling
If I start to feel like I can't live my life how I was living before you (of course in a way respectful of the relationship) I don't want it. That goes for trying to taking me away from my friends/ family or trying to control my views or preferences. Outside of a relationship, I'm still my own woman and should be able to think and move as so. Controlling is one thing, respecting boundaries is another...
7.) You're not fully grown
I want a man. Not a boy. If we can't vibe on a mature level it's a wrap. I'm not in it for the goofy shit 24/7. I need to know that you can keep up with me and act accordingly when the time comes. I also need to know that if a situation arises you can hold it down and take care of me, most women want to feel secure and protected around their man and if you can't deliver then we have a problem.
8.) Your eggplant is a really a Vienna sausage...
For most women that love sex, this would be an issue lol. YOU CAN'T KNOCK THEM WALLS !!!!!!
Everybody is different but again, if you love sex you want DEEP, LONG strokes... Look Y'all know...
9.) You're UGLY AND NOT FUNNY
Lol sorry, but I'm being real. If you ugly you better be funny AND have a great level of confidence. It's already bad enough that I'm dating a man outside of my caliber and on top of that your personality sucks? It's a lose-lose situation bro.
10.) You're cheap
If you're just getting to know me how you gonna be cheap? First of all sir, I like to eat.
No really though, first date and you asking me to split the bill? I don't have a problem doing it but its like damn, the first date though lol. The first impression means everything.
If you really like me you would wow me like any woman would want. Gifts, dinner, shopping and such. Ladies, when the last time you met a man and he said: "Here bae, go get your nails and feet done."
Fellas take some notes lol.
Like I was saying earlier, 2018 is the year that us as women breakthrough. 2018 is the year of healing for us, the year of mental and spiritual awareness, the year of elevation. THEREFORE, WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR YOUR GAMES.
We tried to extend love, it was not being reciprocated though, now it's OUR TIME. TIME TO FOCUS ON US AND ONLY US. TIME TO LOVE OURSELVES. TIME TO BE WHO THE FUCK WE WANT TO BE WITHOUT ANY INTERRUPTION!
So, that's why we don't want to cuff you. We tired of giving and not receiving, for now, we're going to have to like you from a distance or nothing at all.