67 days no sex
After some time away from the blogging game I’m back, here to provide the quality shit you love.
Let me start by saying, I’m moving with intention.
I now dislike doing things with no purpose behind it. I peel back the layers on it all, and search for the benefits, if I find none then more than likely it ain’t happening.
Sex is amazing and I love it, but what I don’t like is having sex with nothing else offered outside of an orgasm. Most people have sex for that reason ONLY. I mean it’s cool but not for me. I’ve tried it and STILL felt UNSATISFIED in most instances.
I’m a lover, and I love to love. I love to indulge into one person fully in ALL aspects. If I’m letting you into my life and space especially on a intimate level, it speaks volume at this point in my growth. I’m open and willing, but I’m cautious of where my time is going now and I’m most definitely stingy with my p#$*y.
WHY SETTLE FOR LESS?
I’m totally not interested in having great sex that sooner than later, becomes a dead end. What happens after those couple of bomb weeks or months? We stop fuckin and now what? I become dick-less and then search for something new?
And it makes me not want to have sex at all.
THIS CONVERSATION IS PERTAINING TO HAVING SEX PRIOR TO ANY COMMITMENT.
Having sex in a relationship is different, because you’ve come into an agreeance with the other person that you’re exclusive. People that like to have sex for fun, or casually don’t get that luxury of it being exclusive these days because it’s
Boundaries are fine, and need to be respected either way, but I found that shit can change quick once a man gets a chance to fuck you for the first time.
It’s a possibility I’ve been fuckn the wrong kind of men, it could also be a reason why I’m
67 days NO SEX.
I’ve been counting the days,
It’s been 67 days no sex because there’s a lack of communication and consistency that turns me off.
Check it out,
With the idea that your wanting to have sex, (good fulfilling sex) have someone that can communicate well and be consistent providing good vibes collectively, kinda sorta sounds like a relationship right?
I dither between the two, which is why SEX IS CANCELLED. No which way you put it, gives me what I want and if I don’t want it why should I accept it?
Most times it’s feels like I’m asking for too much, or maybe, I am asking for too much. My thing is, why do something to half ass it. If you gonna go ahead and fuck somebody why not make it worthwhile, why NOT get the best experience possible? You're literally utilizing your time and energy to give someone 40% when you could have gave 100% and had a 10X better experience? I want to have sex like they do in the movies, I want to set the tone by wearing sexy lingerie sometimes, build up the chemistry, have a hour of four play then get into it.
WHY NOT CONTINUE TO KEEP A GOOD THING GOING IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD?
Feelings can easily get involved in sex and sometimes it’s hard to control how someone makes you feel. But why should you have to hide how you feel? Why aren’t you able to express yourself?
BECAUSE IT’S JUST SEX. YOUR NOT ENTITLED TO, REMEMBER?
I’m celibate by choice, and for many other reasons outside of what I mentioned. One of them being that my time feels wasted for the simple fact that there is NO OBLIGATION, AND NO COMMITMENT NECESSARY. My time also, feels wasted especially when the sex is trash, especially when the communication has a disconnect, and
ESPECIALLY when a word cannot be kept.
It’s all about being decent, we are all humans at the end of the day, no one wants to get treated shitty or feel shitty.
I’m celibate because I do not like feeling objectified.
If we can vibe on a interpersonal level as HUMAN BEINGS BEFORE SEX that’s great, but truthfully who wants to be looked at for what they can solely offer. Men don’t want to be used for money and food, and women don’t want to be used for sex.
I like the “step-by -step” phase of getting to know someone then building from there no matter what’s going on.
I wanna know who you are.
What I want at this point is more than sex, it’s passion, it’s fulfillment of being around a decent human that has emotions, understanding, reason and compassion that can build way beyond sex.
67 days no sex has been one of the best things I have done for myself lately, I’ve been able to find clarity in all that I do, which is where this “new found intention“has deprived from- placing and seeking purpose with my actions.
I’ve been able to look in the mirror and see different reflections of the woman I used to be, the woman I’m becoming and the woman I am aspiring to be all at once.
I’ve found extreme peace in not having sex for the last two months. No one to worry about, fuss with, or try to make time for. Ideally,
LESS STRESSED AND MORE BLESSED.
I’ve had a lot of time to reflect on what matters to me and my overall growth. It’s easier to detox my mind body and spirit with no attachment to anyone. It’s easier to stay focused, which means MORE productivity. What I’ve done in the past is the past but still apart of my growth today. I may very well be disappointed in some of my actions but I don’t regret it because it shaped me to be the phenomenal woman I am today.
67 days no sex is teaching me discipline on many levels,
not all the time what I want, is what I need.
The experience is molding me to choose wisely in all things, to set higher expectations for myself, and to hold myself accountable for my worth.
67 days no sex is the beginning of an incredible journey that I’m fully committed to. I’m no longer searching for a fling, a situationship OR a boyfriend, I’m healing and in the process, waiting on my HUSBAND.